For a laugh, I thought I would take a moment to critique the work of a spammer to see if there's anything we can all learn from such annoying tactics. I just received this gem of an email and thought it would make some light Monday lunchtime reading for you.
Dear Sir/Madam,
Do you want to see your website in Top 10 position in Google or other major search engine?
Do you want more targeted visitors on your website?
If yes, please let us know your domain name which you want to optimize.
We will analysis your website and send full SEO proposal with plan and activity which will implement on your website.
Most firms overseas have achieved a significant amount of savings by outsourcing either complete or part of their SEO Work to us in India.
All our work remains in the background and the end client never knows that the work has been outsourced resulting in both savings and brand value for you and your company.
We are looking forward to a long and fruitful business relationship with you and your company.
We are waiting for your positive response.
Kind Regards
Rahul
Internet Marketing Strategist
P.S. This is an advertisement and a promotional mail strictly on the guidelines of CAN-SPAM act of 2007 .We have clearly mentioned the source mail-id of this mail, also clearly mentioned the subject lines and they are in no way misleading in any form.We have found your mail address through our own efforts on the web search and not through any illegal way. If you don't wish to receive mails from our end, please click on Unsubscribe and you do not receive any further promotional mail.
The critique :
Dear Sir/Madam,
Firstly, sod off, I'm busy! And secondly you're starting off on a bad foot already. What if the recipient is trans-gender? Eh?
Do you want to see your website in Top 10 position in Google or other major search engine?
Begs the question, how did you find me in the first place? But yeah, why not. I would love to appear top 10 for the search "apple".
Do you want more targeted visitors on your website?
Sure, I've always wanted pointy-shaped people to visit my site, or those on the top most wanted...
If yes, please let us know your domain name which you want to optimize.
Oh dear Rahul. You almost had me interested there. We British severely dislike the letter z in the word optimise. You could go a long way to learn about YOUR audience my friend... On a positive note, this chap is using the "Power of Threes" to try to drum-up interest in what he's selling. This is a proven technique and is used by marketeers and politicians alike. Worth reading about.
We will analysis your website and send full SEO proposal with plan and activity which will implement on your website.
This roughly translates to "We'll tap in your web address to some SEO software and send you the automated report that comes out the other end". Good work at over-selling it though. That said, he's successfully managed to sum up what they can do in one line. Can you do that about your business?
Most firms overseas have achieved a significant amount of savings by outsourcing either complete or part of their SEO Work to us in India.
Ah, really? Proof please! Again, Rahul is using some clever and proven techniques. This time, he's generating desire by talking about what other customers have experienced as a result of using their services. This is a common facet of the marketing approach called "AIDA" and another area I would suggest you read up on.
All our work remains in the background and the end client never knows that the work has been outsourced resulting in both savings and brand value for you and your company.
I'm sure this level of white-labelling appeals to some, but to me it doesn't. However Rahul's throwing lots of benefits at you now to draw those that might be tempted by his near perfect english and tropical charm (I believe this line was used in Big Bang Theory, a TV series that you HAVE to watch!).
We are looking forward to a long and fruitful business relationship with you and your company. We are waiting for your positive response.
Kind Regards
Rahul
Internet Marketing Strategist
This bit always kills absolutely any chance of me ever wanting to bring in outside help. Truth is, they're not waiting, as i'll receive another email from them in about 2 days time. If this is what Rahul is like with potential clients, I feel for any future partners of his! However, with your marketing hat on, he's attempted to show interest in working with you in a way I'm sure they feel is not too schmooozy. Fact is, it is!
P.S. This is an advertisement and a promotional mail strictly on the guidelines of CAN-SPAM act of 2007 .We have clearly mentioned the source mail-id of this mail, also clearly mentioned the subject lines and they are in no way misleading in any form.We have found your mail address through our own efforts on the web search and not through any illegal way. If you don't wish to receive mails from our end, please click on Unsubscribe and you do not receive any further promotional mail.
Oh sod off, it's still a spam email! There's no way I can justify this part with marketing other than the fact that they're potentially trying to justify the un-solicited email. I love the fact they've copy and pasted this from another spam email, as their original email has no un-subscribe link :)
Business Summary Time (UTC + 1 hour)
Let's face it, you cannot escape from spam emails but credit has to be given where the spammer attempts to use proven marketing techniques to gain your interest and business.
On the whole this email was a pile of rubbish but there are techniques you can learn from.
Next time you're rustling up some marketing for your business make sure you consider the "power of three", AIDA and succinct "waffle-free" text.
Right, now back to work the lot of you!